My boys are awesome! I had to start by saying that. As parents we tend to concentrate on the struggles, and we sometimes forget how amazing our kids really are and how much progress and efforts they make every day. We have two boys, both diagnosed with Sensory Processing Disorder. Although there are some similarities, their SPD manifests completely opposite to one another most of the time. If I had to choose one subtype for each one, I would say that I have a sensory avoider and a sensory seeker…. FUN right? The daily challenge is finding that middle ground and teaching them to understand each other. The good thing is that they are inseparable, but there are definitely moments in which they must be apart.

My oldest son was diagnosed with SPD in 2007 when he was almost 5 years old. Since then, I’ve learned to see the world in a whole different perspective. When I first heard about SPD, I was completely clueless. I felt lost, I felt alone, and extremely sad for him because it wasn’t something that could be fixed with mommy’s kiss. None of it made sense! That was not the way we grew up, it was not what we expected, and we couldn’t comprehend it. I cried many times, and spent sleepless nights looking for answers and thinking of ways to help him overcome his condition. I decided to dive into the SPD world, full force, whether people understood it or not. I was determined to learn and understand as much as I could about SPD, so I researched and read all that I could that was related to SPD. But also, I had to trust my mommy instinct because nobody knew my son better than I did. With time, I was finally able to see the world through his eyes and how challenging it could be for him. Luckily, I have been blessed with having a stronger bond with him that we’ve ever had.

My youngest son was recently diagnosed last September, but I’ve always known. We just didn’t have the “label”. All his behaviors were telling us that there was something different about him, but since he was so opposite to his brother, it was easier to discard it and think of it as “typical” (as everyone else called it too). But again, my instinct told me otherwise, and little by little I started noticing more and more sensory seeking behaviors and how he also needed our help. My husband and I were already applying the techniques and sensory diet we learned with our oldest son’s OT and psychologist. We tried to make things standard across the board with both of them to avoid additional conflicts. However, we still had to make additional adjustments because he needed a lot more input than he was receiving. It was exhausting at first. After a few weeks, we started seeing significant improvements at school and at home. So we knew then that we had make the right decision and that we were on our way to success with our little one too.

Both of them have come a long way. My oldest was a boy who at first was considered oppositional, a jealous brother, possibly autistic. He exhibited OCD behaviors, was a picky eater, had anxiety, had tactile issues, was extremely sensitive, suffered from night terrors, had problems interacting socially, didn’t like to participate in PE class, didn’t enjoy birthday parties, and so on…Four years later, the story is different. We all know he has SPD. Even he understands his sensitivities. He is learning to be flexible and let go of that control (an ongoing learning process). He has many friends. He loves PE and participates in every Field Day at school. He wants to go to his friend’s birthday parties but recognizes when it’s time to leave because he’s getting overwhelmed. He is in the honor roll, and even participated in the Spelling Bee this year. My youngest is our “bouncy” boy and my sunshine. He was like the energizer bunny, always on the go. He was constantly bumping into things and other people. He would hurt himself but would not complain. He couldn’t tell when he was tired, had trouble falling asleep, had sensitivities to smells and certain textures. He got depressed when he started pre-school, exhibited anxiety, and at Kindergarten he had problems concentrating and completing his work. Homework was a challenge, and so on… After only a few months of occupational therapy and making adjustments at home, he sleeps better. There is no more bed-wetting. He has learned to use the heavy belt for homework. At school he is completing his work without any issues. He is learning to take breaks and do heavy work when needed. He is not bumping into people or things as much. He is not screaming incessantly as before and he finally learned to ride his bike without his training wheels.

I told my oldest son I was writing an article for other parents, and that I needed his suggestions. I was really curious as to what he had to say. He said to me, “Mom, you could write about my hiding place, where I go to feel safe when I don’t feel good. You can suggest to the parents to do the same for their kids.” I told him that was a great idea, but then he continued, “You could also tell them to get bean bags, or how I go in the hammock and wrap myself in, and start swinging…” So I asked him, “Why would you want me to tell them about all that?” He replied, “I don’t know mom. I just know it helps me!” At such a young age (he is 9 years old), I’m so proud that he is able to identify things that he could do to help himself, and also, that he wants to share it with other people. Moments like this are precious and priceless, and we have to recognize them as such.

I know our journey isn’t over and as time goes by, I’m sure new challenges will come our way. However, I want to savor all the steps they make in the right direction. I need to celebrate every little success, and focus on what’s important. If I only look at the long road ahead, I would miss out on so many wonderful things they have accomplished along the way. Most people may not understand why it is such big deal or why I get so excited and emotional when I talk about my kids and how much they have accomplished. I know they don’t have a clue what we go through every day, and sometimes I may try to explain it to them. However, I prefer to concentrate on doing what’s right for my children. Having kids with SPD has truly been a challenge but mostly a blessing I’m grateful for. They inspire me every day. They have helped me learn a lot about myself, to be a better parent, to be a better person and to appreciate life without taking it for granted. Seize the moment!

REBECCA GONZÁLEZ is married and a lucky stay-at-home mom of 2 boys that have Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD). She spends her days doing the best she can to make life easier and more enjoyable for her family. Rebecca is an SPD Foundation Parent Connections Host and the founder of Let’s Talk SPD, which is a support group in South Florida for families with children with SPD.

This entry was posted on Wednesday, December 28th, 2011 at 1:42 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.